I hate you, PAM

First, and most importantly, there will be a future post dedicated to the hotness that is Tim Riggins on FNL, but something came up that needs posting -- immediately.

Ok. . .

I'm on staycay w/ the fam this week. It's nice. For the past THREE MONTHS, I have been douchebag free at work. Meaning -- I have not worked w/ some super annoying Passive Aggressive Movers, aka PAMs. So when setting out for work, I let all of the people I have been working with know that I'm out but still very available via email. Since I'm so available on email, I did not put out an "out of office" message. My bad, I admit, but I had not heard from other humans at that place for months. I was rushed on my way out, and it slipped my mind.

Well, b/c of my "failure" to do this, the. world. has. ended. at. the. shithole. i. call. work. Today, I see I have a voicemail from PAM. I ignore it. Then, I get an email from PAM asking me to do research. I respond, promptly -- Sorry, I'm out of the office, blah blah blah. I get this gem back:

"I'll get someone else to do the research because we need it done in the next few days. I waited to hear back from you to give you the first opportunity. You should add an 'out of office' message to your email and change your voicemail message so people know you're out. Have a nice break."

OH MY GOD. Can you get any more passive aggressive? Give me the first opt, huh? Um, you basically kicked me off your case months ago. Change my voicemail? NO ONE has ever done that. I really love the "have a nice break" too. I'm sure you reeaaallly mean that one. Why not just say what you want to say:

"You suck because you did not put an out of office message. I will now never think of you again for an assignment, so have fun looking for a new job since I have blacklisted you, bitch. I hope your break sucks and you get a flesh-eating virus b/c I wasted a few hours on this research waiting for your damn reply. Die in hell. Thanks!"

I would respect that. I would want to work for that. But no, I'm stuck w/ PAM -- that ole bitch.