Saturday, July 7, 2007

It has come to this!

1. A and N are driving in State X. A is domiciled in X, but N is domiciled in State Y. A and N are on their way to a sketchy ass bar, where A and N both intend to drink alcohol, and offend other patrons with their dance moves. While in the car, A and N have the windows rolled all the way down. At a stoplight, located right next to Innocent Landowner's backyard, the excessive noise from A and N shouting the lyrics to "Shoop" interrupts a BBQ that Landowner is having with his future in-laws, who Landowner desperately needs to impress in order to gain their approval to marry their daughter. Hearing the awesomeness from the car, however, makes Landowner dance like a white man and lose their approval immediately. Landowner is pissed. Meanwhile, A and N drive off when the light turns green. And Wally Witness can testify to that specific act in a court of law, under oath, while on cross-examination. N begins to speed excessively, but has no intention or malice to do so.

What crimes and acts of negligence can A and N most likely be held accountable for?

A. Creating a nuisance for Landowner due their "Shooping" while driving, which is offset by Landowner's comparative negligence in having horrible dance moves, which may actually be the proximate cause of losing his woman.

B. Nothing because State X can show a compelling interest for their "Shooping" while driving, and their "Shooping" does not violate the Privileges and Immunities Clause under the 14th Amendment because that is ALWAYS the wrong answer.

C. Guilty of absolute reckless awesomeness due to their "Shooping" while driving, and guilty of conspiracy to sing that song loudly while in the car. Evidenced by the fact that before entering the vehicle, N turns to A and says, "We are listening to "Shoop." It's that kind of night baby!" To which, A neither announced her desire not to be involved and did nothing to stop N, and instead, overtly inserted that CD.

D. All of the above.

E. None of the above because Landowner does not exist and is completely made up. And since when did the bar have option E. Shit, I'm going to fail.

1 comment:

Niki said...

C, it's got to be C - because N and A are ALWAYS guilty of reckless awesomeness.