I have realized that I hate people who run, and then proceed to ruin the rest of my day talking about their damn run. Now I don't mind people who run--it's a good exercise--I'm talking about the damn people who run, and tell you about every step.
"Whew, I had a good run today. Not like my run yesterday. This one, about 20 minutes into it, I was just running good."
Who the F cares??? I don't--the people who can overhear our conversation don't. I'm convinced these people are just so stuck on themselves that they think I give two cents about how when their song came on, they just booked it. I especially love how they want your entire life to be put on hold, so they can run too.
"Oh, I'd love to join you, but would you mind waiting until 9 30 pm? I know it's 6 15 and everyone wants to leave at 7, but I really need to run."
Well, you know what--you can run straight to hell. Please--don't stop until you get there.
I mean seriously--you run on a treadmill for like 25 damn minutes. You are no Olympic athlete. I don't admire you. And for you guys who only run--let me tell you, the 88 lb. frame that is your running figure--the panties just fall. . .
So for future reference--I'm so incredibly impressed by your ability to knock 7 seconds off your 3-mile run. I even keep my own diary of your running stats for my personal entertainment. So there's no need for you to recreate every painful step for me in the future. And no, I'm not waiting on your stupid ass anymore. And oh--the rest of us do exercise too--we just have lives and don't feel the need to tell you about it.
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1 comment:
this cracks me up - especially the part about waiting until 930 so they can run - SO true. i miss you!!
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